Sunday, August 29, 2010

Life just gets more interesting

Life just gets more interesting every time the sun rises. I've been applying for jobs to stay afloat as this contract winds down to it's end. I'm nervous. And I'm not. My dad, in the meantime, has made an amazing offer. I just don't know what to do with it. He's offered up his condo and the funds (at 5% amoritized over 30 years) to go back to school at SDSU to finally get my B.A.. My brain is doing overtime. I did go ahead and apply. I've got 192 credits and no degree. (I'm feeling a little like Van Wilder with all the extra course credits and nothing to show for it.) Good jobs in my neck of the woods almost require a degree. Any degree.

Thing is I'm not sure I want a degree anymore. Yes, it would make the job situation a little easier. Yes, I'd have the loan to pay off. I don't have CA state residency status so the funding is higher than I would like. There is serious concern that even if I am allowed admission the school isn't guaranteeing there will be a place for me until the state approves next years budget. Do I really want to get in the middle of that? I don't mind going back to school for a class or two...but for a year and a half? Uh...I dunno.

What I really want is something I should have been doing all along. I should have been submitting my stories for publication - anywhere - well, everywhere. I wonder that mor schooling would make much of a difference. The differences I've felt in recent years have been through the writer's group I was part of in WI. I've been thinking that may be something to get back into here. I don't need to go back to LaLa Land for that.

Since the offer was made I got on the stick (pogo stick, it seems) and found three sites that are requesting story submissions that will pay for those they accept. I've finished one story. I sent it on to a friend to get some feedback before I send it in. We'll see. These aren't anything that will pay the bills. Mostly they might put gas in the car. Again, we'll see. The story has certainly kept me busy this week. It's been a good busy.

On the job front I was able to reconnect with a running buddy and sent my resume and a chatty letter to pass it along to those she knows. Now I'm just sending prayers that something pops up that will make me happy when October arrives.

I know much of this toronado of thought from Dad's offer comes on the heels of booking my flight down to San Diego to get away for a week, see my daughter and the rest of my family and shake off this last job. Every day I wonder that there is so much to do, so little time and deadlines looming in my face. I am beat at the end of the day. Just getting home is the goal. I don't have time to request transcripts which are already available because it's the same school I'm applying at. And really would I be bettering myself or putting off a dream I've had since I was twelve?

Maybe this is just the impetous to scare me into doing that which I've always been afraid of.